Engineering for the Rest of Us by Sarah Drasner
- If you feel defensive ask clarifying questions to identify what made it rise, ex.
- Did you feel accused of something you didn't do?
- Are they calling out an action they think was less beneficial for the group?
- Why did you do what you did?
- Disengage the fight or flight reaction
- Values:
- Did you not honor values this person does?
- What values do you have to pertain to this situation?
- Sometimes its because you unintentionally stepped over someone's boundaries or violated their values